Amanda Cade

Worth It! (Things to try, read, watch, hear, and discuss)

Christmas Presents

I tend to spend a lot of money at Christmastime. In addition to my family, I buy gifts for coworkers and my circle of friends. I’m always on the lookout for the perfect gift, and I rarely consider price. I mean, I’m not going to go crazy and buy things that I can’t afford, but I’ve been known to be a little extravagant if I see just the right thing, or for someone who’s been going through a rough time, or is super important to me. Cost comparison has never crossed my mind, especially since I have more discretionary income than a lot of my friends (largely because most of them have kids).

So I was surprised the other day when a dear friend apologized for not being able to “match” the gift I had given her (we had exchanged gifts early). It hadn’t occurred to me to wonder if I was inadvertently making people feel bad when I splurged on their presents. I was glad she brought it up, because it gave us a chance to talk about it, and for me to reassure her that I buy gifts for the joy of giving, and I don’t care about the cost of what I receive in return.

That prompted me to have a conversation with several other people to see if any of them felt the same way. Most completely understood where I was coming from (and one happily proclaimed that I can splurge on his presents whenever I want), and a few requested a spending limit to avoid the possibility of feeling awkward.

In the end, I’m happy to have had this brought to my attention, and for the chance to prevent causing unintended guilt.

sleigh

What do you think about “overgifting”? Is it something you’ve encountered (as a giver or receiver)?

21 thoughts on “Overgifting? (Blogmas Day 18)

  1. alexraphael says:

    Ah, you’re so kind and genetous and giving.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I get excited about presents. Nothing beats giving someone the perfect gift.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. alexraphael says:

        Ah you are soooooooooooo sweet

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Simon says:

    It’s a nice thing to do but it can lead to pressure being put on you as people expect it. I’ve not experienced this as a receiver 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      That’s a very good point. Hadn’t thought about that, either.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Simon says:

        You don’t until you’re there lol

        Liked by 1 person

  3. kagould17 says:

    The old adage “It is the thought that counts” likely applies here. We are always on the lookout for the perfect gift for those in our circle. When we see it or think of it, we tend to buy it at that point. It may be expensive, but mostly, it is something that reminds us of the receiver and can be quite inexpensive. Sometimes, it is Christmas baking for those who do not bake and other times, a coupon for future services (travel, pet sitting). I can see how over gifting can cause discomfort among those either receiving or simply watching. One Christmas we saw someone receive 3 I-Pads. We felt out of place with our home made gifts. Yikes. In any case, give with a pure heart. Merry Christmas Amanada

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      Merry Christmas! 🎄

      Liked by 1 person

  4. The Eclectic Contrarian says:

    *hug*

    Merry Christmas Amanda!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      *hug* Merry Christmas! 🎄

      Liked by 1 person

      1. The Eclectic Contrarian says:

        I couldn’t get you anything and I didn’t think you’d like a hard time.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Amanda Cade says:

        I think I’m full up on hard times right now. Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      3. The Eclectic Contrarian says:

        I’m sorry… *hug*

        I reckon you’re deserving of 2 Christmas hugs.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Lacie Elder says:

    Your so generous! and I think if you enjoy giving, nothing else really matters!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Jay says:

    It can be hard to think of good ideas so when you find a perfect gift, you go for it. If you have the means to do that, awesome. But your gifts probably aren’t given with any expectation of reciprocity and I think that’s fair.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      That’s always my intention. I never expect to be “matched”.

      Like

  7. J Balconi says:

    I run into that “unmatchable” situation both as a giver and recipient, mostly the former. It doesn’t matter to me because my friends and family have disparate incomes and budgets, although I no longer accept trips because that truly has been awkward.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      Trips are one thing that definitely should be discussed in advance. I would (and have) accept a trip from my parents, and once a college friend bought me a plane ticket to visit her, but that’s it.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I would have to say that I am probably an under gifter while a friend of mine is an over gifter. I think if there’s thought and love behind it, then it’s sweet. But having the conversation with someone is nice too!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I’m glad that I now know everyone’s thought on the subject, so I know exactly who I can splurge on without them feeling awkward.

      Liked by 1 person

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