Amanda Cade

Worth It! (Things to try, read, watch, hear, and discuss)

Hello, everyone. As you know, I’m big on staying positive and living your best life, which is what many of my blog posts and a lot of my Instagram account is all about. However, I don’t want anyone to think that I believe a positive mindset makes all your problems go away, or that I’m suggesting that there’s something wrong with having times where you’re just not ok.

It’s taken me a little while to reach a point where I felt like blogging about this, but I’m there now. For a few weeks, I have not been entirely ok. Work has been extremely stressful, I’ve had some serious disappointments both personally and professionally, and both a relative and someone I used to work with passed away. I’ve had a long series of emotional gut punches, and it’s been very difficult.

So I’ve been reflecting on everything that’s been going on, and wanted to share a few important things to remember when you hit a dark stretch.

1. It’s all right to take time for yourself.

looking-at-water.jpegOver the past few weeks, I’ve been terrible about keeping up with all the great blogs I follow. I temporarily offloaded a few things at work. I backed out of social commitments. I took several personal days. And I briefly struggled with guilty feelings related to all of those things. However, I reminded myself that I had to prioritize, and that one of those priorities had to be my emotional health. I needed to rest. I needed to spend time with my family. I needed to provide support for people who were hurting more than I was, and then set aside time to focus on my own grief. There’s nothing selfish about taking care of yourself.

2. Use your strength wisely.

When we’re emotionally exhausted, we aren’t able to operate at the same level as when things are going well, so it’s important to prioritize. There have been lots of times over the past few weeks when I needed to put on my game face and put my troubles in a mental box on a shelf. It’s important to conserve energy for those situations, and then to allow yourself recovery time afterwards. Even when things are tough, it’s a bad idea to withdraw entirely, but you never want to just try for business as usual right away.

3. It’s all right to wait on talking or processing.

As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t want to blog about this right away. When I wrote my last few posts, it was actually a relief to get into a different head space and focus on things I felt good about. I’ve responded to some expressions of sympathy and concern with a simple, “Thank you”, while others have lead to a frank discussion of how I’m feeling. It depended on the circumstances and the person. I’ve even hit full stop on my own emotions when someone in worse shape needed my help. It’s up to you to decide when and how to discuss and work through your feelings.

4. However, you should never feel guilty about leaning on someone.

handsI sometimes find it difficult to open up and admit that I’m struggling, but I’ve been working on that a lot, because it’s so much better when I do. The people who care about us aren’t asking if we’re all right or if we want to talk as an empty social nicety, but because they genuinely want to be there for us. Don’t ever hesitate to ask a friend or loved one for their time, attention, or help. You aren’t “bothering” them-you’re giving them a chance to be there for you.

5. It does get better.

I’m taking it one day at a time and slowly getting back to feeling like myself again. I’ve been through difficult times before, and I know that I will heal. It can be hard to remember that in the middle of everything, but it’s true.

broken heart rain

33 thoughts on “Worth Mentioning: Sometimes Things Get Hard

  1. I know it probably wasn’t easy to write this post, but these are all really important points. I find number four particularly difficult, but I’m learning.I hope things will get better for you soon, and in the meantime, that you will have some great people around to support you on days when things are not so easy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      It’s hard for me, too, but I’ve gotten better at it. I have a very close family and wonderful friends, and they’re helping me a lot.

      Like

  2. Cherryl says:

    I strongly believe we ‘must’ take time out for ourselves – some of us may need it more often than others but it’s essential and deeply therapeutic ๐Ÿ˜Š ๐Ÿ”†

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I absolutely agree.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I think that’s what blogging is all about.

      Like

      1. You are absolutely right.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. somedayillbeontime478 says:

    I love this! Thanks for writing it. Things do get better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I started thinking about this post a few weeks ago, and as the difficult situations kept coming I knew I had to write it. I just needed a little time to be ready. I knew I was starting to get better when I had the strength to write the post.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Shell Vera says:

    Sending hugs through the internet, Amanda. Iโ€™m sorry to hear about the losses youโ€™ve experienced and pray for comfort and peace in the midst of the hurt. Great lessons for dealing with things not going as we expected.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      Thank you. It’s been a difficult time, but things are getting better.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Shell Vera says:

        Iโ€™m glad to hear that. I wrote in my journal once that Iโ€™ve realize my tough times have led me to learn my greatest lessons in understanding my faith, strength, resourcefulness, and resilience. I hope the same for you so they have meaning beyond the pain.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. This is such an important post for this day and age where social media just portrays everyone’s lives to be perfect. I love how your post really gave a kind of reality check to everyone reading. Thank you so much! Bless ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow! Your post really spoke to me. I hope we both feel 110% better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I’m sorry things haven’t been going well for you. I hope you have better days ahead.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Simon says:

    It’s hard when these things happen and it always seems to come at once. I hope things get better for you soon ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      Thank you. I’m definitely hoping for a better week.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Simon says:

        I’ll have fingers crossed for you , let me know how it goes ๐Ÿ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Hi Amanda, Your support system is so important in managing your grief. They provide perspective and encouragement when things appear to be at their worse. Writing about it may provide the comfort you seek as you have many blogger friends who are there for you. Take the time you need to heal. All the best to you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      Thank you so much. ๐Ÿ’–

      Like

  9. Jyo says:

    Well explained and true that !

    Liked by 1 person

  10. alexraphael says:

    I could easily have starred every message here. Totally agree with them all. Hope you always know I and your other followers are here for you.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      I’ve been very grateful to be part of the blogging community, which is so wonderfully supportive.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. alexraphael says:

        Iโ€™m so glad you know that.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Carol Anne says:

    Hey Amanda, sorry you had some trying times lately! I have had some tryihng times too so can relate! I liked your tips! They are all good! I especially liked the one about using your strength wisely! โค โค

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amanda Cade says:

      That was one of most important things for me while everything was going on. It’s easy to get completely exhausted if we aren’t careful. I hope things start to look up for you soon! ๐Ÿ’•

      Like

  12. Awa says:

    Thank you for sharing and allowing yourself to be vulnerable. The best thing one can do is to go through this life as an authentic being, and you are doing that. I measure my capacity in life for everything in terms of energy. Thank you for reminding me to use it wisely. I send you good vibes of strength and healing!

    Liked by 1 person

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